So You Want to Become a Submissive?

Sounds a little like asking if you want to be a rock star, right? Certainly neither the respective lifestyles nor dream aspirations are easy and something few truly understand about. I am the President Elect of the Passionate Ink Chapter of the RWA and we had a board meeting last night. One of the topics of our discussion was about the upcoming BDSM party event the chapter is having at the huge national conference being held in Anaheim California this year. I won’t give you all the juicy details YET as we are still finalizing them but there will be some educational talks and demonstrations about BDSM.

The funny thing is this truly isn’t grabbing onto the supposed new brass ring because of 50 Shades of Grey. The theme was selected last year. BUT…as you can imagine, the chapter is very proud of the fact we are doing something to capitalize on not only how much erotic romance is increasing in popularity but also about the fact that BDSM is being written about more and a genre readers are truly trying to get into. I of course have a BUT in here. The more I learn about the concept the more I realize I have to learn and the more I truly respect those involved. It’s not about pink fuzzy handcuffs and light spanking.

As we began to have a discussion about what we could do and what the panel discussions or educational aspects should be, I really started thinking about how many more misnomers there are with regards to the lifestyle and I’ve talked a bit about some of them. While exploring my needs for writing and enjoying learning more about the lifestyle, I’ve read more pieces from authors who are writing about BDSM – or more of what they think it’s about. Now, BDSM can be playtime to the lifestyle and of course the majority of folks who start out thinking about this read all by themselves first in the privacy of their kindle or nook, making sure NO ONE knows they are kinky. Right? That would be horrible, huh? Interesting how much romance and the erotic romance genre is increasing in popularity.

After getting all hot and bothered reading, they think they’re ready maybe for more. So perhaps they’ll indulge in checking out some website and they will quickly find there are hundreds of forums from the sub’s perspective to the Dom’s, kinky clubs to societies catering to allowing freedom of choice. Then there are groups, such as Fet Life, where you can not only learn but meet people either online or in situations that are called “munches”. Generally these are gatherings of people interested in meeting and learning more about the lifestyle and are held in very public locations, such as restaurants, so that everyone can feel comfortable.

What some people find surprising is that people who crave the playtime and the lifestyle are of course regular people with day jobs and families etc. The munches are simply a fabulous way of talking out in the open without fear of retribution. I was talking to a writer friend of mind, who is just getting interested in the lifestyle, and she is considering going to a munch. I think it’s a fabulous way of truly indulging even in simply fantasies while you’re considering whether or not you could or want to handle the lifestyle. It’s something I’ve considered too and as many of you have spent hours talking to Dom’s and societies. I’ve learned so much – enough to scare me too but I am more than curious.

If you really start clearly seeing yourself in what will be a life altering change in your love, relationship, and possibly every day aspect of simply how you handle yourself, then you could potentially move on to vacation type spots who cater to BDSM and you can have ever fantasy fulfilled. Hedonism of course comes to mind and from your mildest fantasy of you and your partner sharing a beautiful sunset while you make love on the beach to something much kinkier like engaging in a ménage with a stranger or having a man flog your partner, you can find it. Yes, they are safe and you have to be as well so several precautions are taken.

All of the above is slightly clinical but during my discussion with the board last night there was some questions that came up about demonstrating. You know what’s funny? Most people think of BDSM and flogging comes to mind, but do you truly know what you’re talking about? Spanking is different from flogging. Flogging means typically something like a bullwhip or a leather tarse is used and most people also think of the “x” cross as the first picture they envision in clear detail. True they are widely used, but not always. The apparatuses are very expensive and sometimes tough to put in your house.

With the explosion of 50 Shades, what I am terrified of is either having the lifestyle shown too lightly or on the opposite side – as in the dungeons etc. I hope as writers and readers you’ll understand there are so many sides to the concept you can’t put it in a neat package and either explain or truly explore in a short period of time. If you’re writing about the lifestyle, I challenge you to truly do your homework. When I posted a long vent about a ridiculous show Dateline presented a few weeks ago, I had more responses than on any blog. Some of the folks mentioning the show and my blog are and have been involved in the lifestyle for a lot longer than I have been researching and writing, and some of them are truly incensed how so many writers are suddenly experts. Trust me, I know I have just begun to scratch the surface.

In saying that I am guilty of roping up or locking down someone on a cross or bench and flogging them and I have personally never felt a whip on my backside in this manner. How in the world can I write about it effectively? Well, pain is pain but the methodology used by people who truly know what they’re doing involves experience and more than just grabbing a flogger or two from a closet. People can get hurt – not only physically but spiritually. That’s why I am taking more emotional passes at learning and crafting my work.

I’m had more wonderful comments about On Becoming His, the very emotional journey I wrote about two people’s journey into venturing into the lifestyle than any of my other BDSM pieces. Why? Because it’s very emotional to even think about doing something like this – changing your entire life. Imagine just for a second totally obeying another human being? That’s what the lifestyle is about – not about flogging. I caution you as you read to take some of the books with a grain of salt and not judge. This is a forever learning process.

It you’re curious about Jessie and Luke’s journey, which will have at least two more books, you can take a taste for free on the On Becoming His page and the book is on sale at Amazon.

Enjoy learning…

Kisses   xxx

Cassandre

http://www.amazon.com/On-Becoming-His-ebook/dp/B00830WDC2/ref=sr_1_40?ie=UTF8&qid=1336991831&sr=8-40

My Special Guest DH Black

It’s Memorial Day weekend and I wanted to host a fellow writer “friend” of mine who writers erotic thrillers based on our real life heroes – the men and women who serve and protect us from firemen to policemen. These stories are very emotionally packed and have received critical claim. Thank you for being here and let’s take a taste of your newest release.

DH BLACK – THE RETRIBUTION COLLECTION

I am a crime and erotic thriller author and I bring tales of the police and our firefighters – among other wonderful occupations – who keep us safe and hold our lives precious. I do it in a way that’s gritty and in your face and not for the faint of heart. I love trying to bring the real people behind that masks of being the good guy or girl and I also try to do anything in my power to make it real. These books are bloody and gory and leave nothing to the imagination. I am lucky enough to have on, Inferno, still in the top ten on the Omni Lit Best Seller list where it has been for two months. This piece really brings out what horrors and undercover officer goes through and how the work can affect every aspect of their lives. From simply trying to hold a normal life to a love interest, you can imagine what being deep undercover for long periods of time might do.

I hope you like a taste of this one and let me know what you think. Thank you for hosting me, Cassandre.

UNINVITED

A monster shattered Raine Thompson’s life. On a single stormy night, he lost the man of his dreams to a murderer who was never caught. Forced out of his home and away from his friends and family, Raine started a new life in a far away location but one close to a childhood friend, Carlos Tempata. Raine became a recluse as he continued his quest to hunt down the killer himself. And in his tormented dreams, a face continued to haunt him every night. A secret from his past was hell bent on destroying him. Just as he believed he’d remain alone for the rest of his life, a chance encounter on the beach reminded Raine he had to live.

Justin Cameron was a mystery man who showered Raine with not only his affections but also his wealth. Finally enticing him into a relationship, Justin offered Raine his heart in return for Raine’s undying love. But somehow the man wasn’t who he claimed to be and held more than just secrets. As Raine’s dreams became nightmares and his life was placed in jeopardy, Carlos worked to discover the truth against a backdrop of continued deceit. As a series of damning events turned into tragedy, Raine is forced to make a choice. One that could destroy everything he holds dear.

EXCERPT

“She’s choice, brother. You want a piece of her? I just might let you have some.” Sniffing, the man looked up from the teary-eyed woman who wore a look of horror.

“Nah. I got me a little woman. What the hell would she say if I took a piece?” Stone breathed as anger raced through him. He didn’t sign onto the job for this bullshit. Looking away briefly, he knew he had to keep his mouth shut but damn it, he was sick to fucking death of the insanity. The guy was barely human. No, Michael was the epitome of evil personified and Stone was on a personal mission to rid the world of his kind.

“Oh come on. This is sweet meat and easy too. Ain’t nothing better than taking what you want. Your little bitch ain’t gonna be none the wiser. What’s wrong? You a pussy, boy? I don’t hire me no faggots in this organization.” Snorting, Michael cupped the girl’s chin and hissed as he twisted and squeezed her face.

Shaking his head, Stone stepped back away from the scene. “I just like mine begging for my cock.” He stole a glance at the girl, who couldn’t be more than twenty, and resisted yanking out his gun and killing the fucker. They were so damn close to nailing this guy. So close but far enough he knew they powers that be would pull him from the case if they couldn’t get enough ammunition against him. He stole another glance at the girl and sucked in his breath. Strapped to the bed, strings of dark mascara were a garish reminder of the madmen he was working for. Goddamn how much of this shit had he seen? Girls were kept like animals to be played with and toyed with and… No, he could barely take the entire scene any longer, no matter what the hell it meant.

Groggy, the girl squealed behind the thick duct tape.

“Oh the bitch’ll be beggin’ for it. Trust me.” Climbing off the bed, he unfastened his belt as he chuckled. “I got balls the size of grapefruit.” Freeing his cock, he stroked down the length of his shaft as he turned to glare at Stone. “You’re staring. You wanna watch or what? Might learn somethin’ from the master.”

“I’m leaving. Just remember we have a timeline, man.” Yeah, the master of brutality. Holding up his hands he started to walk out of the room. The second he made it to the door he sucked in his breath as he heard the sound of her dress being ripped. Walk out. Don’t play the cards. So close. So fucking close to shutting down not just one asshole but also others. Hell, he didn’t even know half of the freaks involved, but he knew enough to realize the situation was getting out of hand. But sweet Jesus, he was one man. Stone swallowed hard and eased into the tiny living room toward the kitchenette of the sleazy motel. Goddamn he was tired of spending time in shit holes. He’d been deep under cover for so fucking long he was no longer sure of his own name. Michael Siska was one bad man but far too well connected and had skated around the law for years. Stone was determined to stop him. This was daddy’s pride and joy after all and his to keep and protect. What a fucking joke.

Hissing, Stone rubbed his tired eyes and tried not to concentrate of the ugly sounds coming from the other room. The poor girl was squealing and fighting. He thought about the few nights he’d been able to help the girls, if you could call throwing them scraps of food helping. How men lived this way was beyond him. Gripping onto the counter, he attempted to control his breathing. The asshole was not only a major player in a series of drug-riddled crimes including high class brothels in the city but also had a penchant for raping and mutilating women when they got out of line. This was the third time Stone had to stand by while the freak got his jollies off on hurting some innocent girl. Thank God none of them ended up dead or he’d have to blow his cover. The man’s behavior was getting out of hand. Even his lieutenants, as Michael liked to call them, could barely tolerate his level of savagery.

And protecting certain family members was supposed to be a step up. For him it was a one-way ticket into hell.

His pulse racing he started pacing the floor as the sounds continued, the girl crying in anguish. As she wailed, Stone heard what had to be the sound of the asshole backhanding her hard. Then as a series of slaps and grunts filtered into the room he sucked in his breath.

”Shut the fuck up, bitch! You fucking whore!”

Bam! Crack!

Stone cringed and fingered the gun nestled in the back of his pants. As the sounds of her being beaten escalated he knew he’d had enough. Taking three long strides, he made it into the bedroom and stopped short. “What the fuck are you doing?” The girl was barely recognizable from the blood covering her face and neck. Beaten unconscious he wasn’t even sure the girl was breathing.

“Get the hell out of here! You were offered and refused. Just givin’ the tramp what she deserves,” Michael snared as he continued plunging his cock into her savagely.

His body shaking, Stone exhaled slowly as a series of vibrant colors swirled around his field of vision. “Stop fucking beating her.” He closed his eyes and tried to hold it together but rage thrashed through his body until he was barely able to breathe.

“I said get the fuck out.”

As Stone slowly opened his eyes he could see the girl had turned her head and was pleading silently for help. Jesus Chris she was awake for this horror. Sucking in his breath, he licked his dry lips and couldn’t take it any longer. This was never going to end. Suddenly snapping, he yanked his gun and cocked it and realized the freak was too busy raping the girl to hear him. Holding the revolver with both hands he pointed the muzzle toward Michael. “One chance. Stop hurting her. Now!”

Without looking Michael simply laughed. “Fuck off, freak.”

Stone shook his head as he closed the distance and said a silent prayer to a God he would never believe existed.

And then he pulled the trigger.

****

      Flicking his finger across the seam of his mouth, Raine Thompson sighed in contentment. No, he was excited for the first time in a solid few months. They were out together enjoying the simple things in life just like they used to. And nothing was going to fuck it up. The thought giving him a smile, he grabbed his wine glass, swirling the ruby red liquid before taking a huge gulp.

“You look at me like you want to eat me instead of what will be a delicious dinner,” he whispered as he leaned over the table.

“There’s no doubt I’ll have you for dessert and perhaps more than once.” He couldn’t help but smile as he gazed at Brent Miller, his significant other. There was something so engaging about his lover’s smile, including the scar he wore like a badge of honor. From the man’s dancing blue eyes to his shaggy hair, Brent always managed to leave Raine breathless. As he lifted his wine glass in salute, he gave Brent a heated look.

“Well, I guess the birthday hunk does deserve certain treats tonight. But then again it begs the question. Have you been a good boy all year?”

“I didn’t hear you complaining the last time I was sucking your cock.”

Brent broke into a mischievous grin as he shook his head. “You’re incorrigible.” Sighing, he gazed out the window of the restaurant into the darkened night. Exhaling slowly, he fingered the rim of his glass in an aimless pattern.

“Why the long face?”

“Just business. I’m just worried. You know me.”

“I know you’re worried but the economy is going to turn around. Besides, we said no shop talk tonight.” Easing his hand across the table Raine brushed the tip of his finger back and forth across Brent’s wrist. When Brent pulled his hand away quickly Raine knew there was something else going on. “Spill it.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I know you too well. Remember? Me? I’ve been your live in lover for like four years.” While he smiled Raine could feel the tension mounting between them. He took another sip of his wine and concentrated on the crowd in the restaurant, pretending to give a shit. The seafood restaurant was their favorite and one they reserved for special times. Oddly enough they hadn’t been here in over six months. Hell, he couldn’t even remember the reason why but they’d simply stopped doing the majority of things they loved. Then again they hadn’t had a whole lot to celebrate in quite a while and the economy was only partly to blame.

Tick. Tock.

“You might as well tell me.”

Brent shrugged and sat back in his seat. “Look, I didn’t want to tell you this tonight but I have to go away on business for a couple of weeks – maybe longer. I don’t know.”

WHERE TO FIND ME

http://dhblack.wordpress.com/

dhblack@dhblack.com

http://www.omnilit.com/storeSearch.html?searchBy=author&qString=D.+H.+Black

Facebook fan page https://www.facebook.com/DHBlackauthor

Thanks so much for being here DH – come back any time.

Kisses – and have a fabulous holiday if you’re in America!   xxx

Cassandre

Done… Flash Fiction Friday

It’s that time again and one I love – Flash Fiction Friday. It’s where a group of very talented writers get together and use a single picture – 100 words, no more and no less, and describe the scene. Today is haunting… Or so I think. Tell me what you think. And please stop by and visit everyone else.

DONE

Tears slipped from Jason’s eyes as he stood in the rain, his heart racing. He’d lost her – the one woman in his life who understood him and his needs. Sniffing, he shook his head as he walked toward the pier. For some reason he was comforted by the chill sweeping through his body. There was no doubt she completed him and what did he do? With one word he’d forced her out of his bed and his life and there was no way he could live without her. Walking closer to the raging water, he whispered his last word. “Done.”

I so hope you enjoyed…

Kisses   xxx

Cassandre

Benjamin Russell: http://incubuschronicles.blogspot.com/

Patricia Logan http://naughtypassions.blogspot.com/?zx=d735233d541ad690

S. J. Maylee: http://SJMaylee.com

Savannah Chase http://www.savannahchase.com/blog

Muffy WIlson:  http://muffywilson.blogspot.com

ER Pierce: http://www.erpierce.com

Kendel Davi: http://kendeldavi.wordpress.com

Sherri Hayes: http://sherri-hayes.blogspot.com/

Gemma Parkes: http://gemmaparkes.blogspot.com/

Sherry Palmer: http://michellechatton.blogspot.ca/

CyrilJ. Michael: http://authorcyriljmichaels.blogspot.ca/

Venus Cahill: http://www.venusbookluvr.blogspot.ca/

Bonni Sansom: http://bonnisansom.blogspot.com/

Leann Mitchell: http://leannmitchell.blogspot.com/

So Ya Wanna Be a Writer? Jimmy Buffett Style…

   Shhh… wanna know a secret and a guilty pleasure of mine? So, it’s wacky Wednesday – at least in my world and I wanted to do an entirely different post than I normally do. I’ve been dealing with some crap in my life lately (we all go through periods of time) and I was reminded yesterday by hearing a favorite song of mine that we all can’t take life but so seriously. That includes all of us as writers. In talking with other writers in several of the Facebook rooms lately and in seeing what seems to be increasing stress, I realized I was falling into the same frustrating and worrying mode it’s SO easy to get into when you are…well, stressed.

A little probably unknown tidbit about me – For the record – I am a card carrying, been to several concerts and yes wearing tropical attire including headpieces, purchased every album he’s even made and DVD’s parrot head. YEP – you heard it here first. I LOVE Jimmy Buffett and all he stands for. And before you roll your eyes as bad bar or club renditions of Margaritaville give you horrible flashbacks to days gone by, what many of you may or may not know about this man is he is a consummate business man and a multi-million dollar franchise owner – along with continuing at 65 years of age young to perform every year in front of thousands.

If you’ve never heard his music or gone to the always sold out for months ahead concerts – being a parrot head is a state of mind. It’s like taking a vacation every day through music, clothes, food, locations, clubs, and books and in seeing his wonderful words where you can make almost anything fun. You see not only is Jimmy a musician but he’s an author – an award winning on the New York Times Best Seller list author. He writes everything from a campy stories, set of course in beach like areas, to children’s books. He’s actually damn good and through reading his stories I always have a smile on my face – something that’s been tough for me this last year.

Why do I bring up the man and his mega empire? A couple of reasons. He started out in Biloxi Mississippi as a bar/lounge singer – and yes he started out in country music. He slowly – VERY slowly – garnered a following and in the early eighties really started making a name for himself. As he grew in popularity and changed his style to more island music, he also began giving back to the community. So much so that with Biloxi was devastated by hurricane Katrina, he was contacted by the Governor of the state and together they decided on and Jimmy funded his brand new casino/hotel/entertainment facility giving over 1,000 much needed jobs and careers for the area. It’s doing well, even in this brutal economy. But…his reason for doing something of this nature was about giving people a welcome respite from their every day lives and traumas.

I had shed about a bazillion tears this last couple of weeks and had my SO put on one of the oldest collaborations he did with a man who is Jimmy’s friend and Coral Reefer band member – Mac McAnally. The song called It’s My Job – is really something that hit home with me. It’s a fun piece of course but it talks about if you think you have a sucky job – just wait… I’ve provided a link – sadly this is one of the first recordings/videos so it’s not that exciting but he does a fabulous rendition on a Live album – Cincinnati. Of course of which I own. It really made me think about writing.

  So you want to be a writer – really? Do you think all you have to do is sit down, write the next great American novel, find a good publisher and wahla – you are a hit? Excuse me while I go get a margarita. That’s not only unlikely to happen – don’t care what happened to the woman from 50 Shades… It’s just not. I have a lot of books out and what I do know and am learning are some important lessons… Loyalty really does goes a long way – whether it’s from a publisher to a writer or vice versa and your reader loyalty will help increase your sales as well. This is not a sprint – it’s a lifelong journey if you have the endurance. People are catty and jealous – but in truth bad behavior is no different than in any other type of job. And… guess what, the starting pay sucks. Why do I use the work sucks?

I talk to writers, including new ones and some still have stars in their eyes about writing. Not trying to burst any bubbles but being more realistic about my goals and needs from writing. If you stop loving to write, or are pushed into being something you’re not, it’s going to reflect in your books, your life, your passion and your love. I haven’t taken time out for me in so long I was starting to lose me. Sorry folks, going to get HER back.

One of the comments Mac says about It’s My Job – is that any job is good, no matter how much it might suck, because it’ll help you get to a job that’s less sucky. Sounds simple but isn’t that profound? After shedding tears about so many things, when my SO put on the music I couldn’t help but smile. Then he used an interesting correlation. He said… Tell other writers that the very first royalty statement they receive is going to suck. Unless lightning strikes, and that is really only one in a trillion, it’s going to suck. After you pick yourself up off the floor and then photocopy the check or the print out from Paypal you decide if you want to go on. Most of us do and will.

Okay – it’s a few months later and you get another check. If you’ve done your homework, marketing etc, guess what? The check will suck less. And the next one will suck even less. Do you get where I’m going with this? Writing is and has to be a passion. Don’t allow the naysayers and the ones who might be jealous or those who possibly will try and derail your career along the way. Do this for YOU and the rest will – eventually suck less.

As for Jimmy – I suggest to garner a smile you go to his fabulous Internet site – www.margaritaville.com for some sexy merchandise and just a fabulous place that will remind you what life really is about. As for his music – here’s the link so you can have a little fun. I hope you garnered an insight into a little bit about the wicked girl – who’s also an island girl. Smile today and listen to some festive music.

Kisses   xxx

Cassandre

“Living and dying in three quarter time…”  Jimmy Buffett

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6d2wCIRTsxQ

Jezebel’s Punishment… Tantalizing Tuesdays

It’s that time again – another sexy little Tantalizing Tuesday – a bunch of sexy writers get together and write a piece to a picture we get to choose – 200 words, no more and no less. This week the sexy and oh-so delectable Benjamin T. Russell and I are using the same pic in an ongoing saga of Jezebel and Luke’s journey into the D/s lifestyle. We have bee working on the second in the collection together. The first, On Becoming His – is now available at Amazon. The second – Becoming His & A New Beginning is in the works. So… we thought we’d give you two points of view on a much needed discipline and one that she wasn’t quite expecting…

Jezebel’s Punishment

Jezebel was apprehensive and very concerned. They were going out, something she loved, and yet she knew what she’d done deserved punishment. Nibbling her bottom lip, she could tell by the stern look on his face just how disappointed Luke was in her behavior. For some reason she continued to stretch boundaries – ones she knew better than to push. “I know you’re angry, sir.”

Sighing, Luke looked away before opening his legs and beckoning to her. “Come.”

“Yes, sir.” She longed for him to spank her so perhaps she’d be forgiven. Closing the distance, she stood trembling in front of him, but not from fear. Need.

Luke brushed his hands up the back of her legs, caressing her naked ass before raising his eyebrows. “What are you asking for, Jezebel?”

“Please punish me.”

He took his time, saying nothing. Then he eased his hands up her back, pushing her down to the floor at the same time. “Very well. As you know, we’re going out so I expect you to wear your finest tonight. I plan on showing you off.”

“Yes, sir.”

“This is something I never wanted to do.” Luke removed her collar.

Tears cascaded down her cheeks. “No!”

I hope you enjoyed and don’t forget to stop by and visit Benjamin’s selection and the rest of the sexy writers as well.

Kisses   xxx

Cassandre

Benjamin T. Russell http://incubuschronicles.blogspot.com/

Naomi Shaw: http://naomisfantasies.wordpress.com

Julez S Morbius: http://morbiussworld.blogspot.co.uk/

Lee Brazil: http://leebrazilauthor.blogspot.com

Sherry Palmer: http://michellechatton.blogspot.ca

Venus Cahill: http://venusbookluvr.blogspot.ca

Muffy WIlson: http://muffywilson.blogspot.com

Molly Synthia: http://mollysynthia.com

Don Abdul: http://don-abdul.blogspot.com/

Kharisma Rhayne: http://www.kharismarhayne.com/

Dianne Hartsock: http://diannehartsock.wordpress.com/tantalizing-tuesday-4/

ER Pierce: http://www.erpierce.com

Havan Fellows: http://havanshawthaven.blogspot.com/

Cyril J. Michael: http://authorcyriljmichaels.blogspot.ca/

Gemma Parkes: http://gemmaparkes.blogspot.com/

On Becoming His Buy Link

http://www.amazon.com/On-Becoming-His-ebook/dp/B00830WDC2/ref=sr_1_40?ie=UTF8&qid=1336991831&sr=8-40

Family Values and Discrimination…

There has been a hell of a lot of talk in Richmond Virginia the past few weeks about family values and in sitting reading the newspaper today, columnists continued their discussions on the latest atrocities regarding the member of the House of Delegates who was shunned from being appointed into office as a judge. Public opinion is of course the single reason is that he is very openly gay. We can all sigh and say – just another issue but it’s even far more reaching.

What I found interesting about the one columnist today is he equated the situation to the happenings in NC where gay marriage was highly banned – what you may or may not know is that the vote was put down mostly by African American voters. I’m not sure we really want to go down that road – after all discrimination is that no what the reason – at least in my opinion.

The other aspect has continually been brought out is about family values. Can gay marriage/households have them. WHAT? You have to be kidding me. They go to work and pay their taxes, love and have friends and family. Isn’t that the epitome of having family values? When I started writing same sex pieces, I heard a lot of basic crap about what it might do to my writing and sales – as in it could be a bad thing. WHY? I have really yet to hear anything decent in comments and to date, my latest piece released yesterday – about guess what, family values – seems to be doing well.

I think in going the blog hop its important for all of us to think about family indeed. I think there is such difficulties in people being able to enjoy relationships and when you mix family in the middle, whether we’re talking about children or our parents, cousins, aunts etc and you are involved in a same sex relationship, things can be tough and opinions and times tough for all those involved. I like to think of family as the strongest support system and rally around that but sometimes it’s tough when members of your own family honestly don’t believe in your lifestyle.

I’ve seen terrible arguments and more than one series of hurt feelings – even to the point of destroying the family unit over the years and it’s so sad. Right now we as humans have so much to deal with anyone from financial crises to illness, death to unemployment. Why make it harder?

In penning DONE, I wanted to take a look at what happens when two men longed not only to get married but have a child – and something of course goes terribly wrong. This blog isn’t about my piece but about the reverent thinking I had to do in penning the piece and really thinking about family values. I truly love it. To that end – let me hear from you. Tell me a story about your family values – and one that stretch the boundaries and the best story gets a copy of DONE.

Don’t forget to join all the other writers in this fabulous cause

http://hopagainsthomophobia.blogspot.com/

Kisses   xxx

Cassandre

Fighting Discrimination…

Participating in the fight against homophobia blog hop and I’m honored. For those of you who know me, I write in several different genres including same sex. I have had gay friends over the years and we certainly talk about issues including the continued discrimination against gays and the gay lifestyle. The topics have been lively and varied and because of that I have written several pieces reflecting what I hope is more of reality – and what is that? Love is love, no matter what sex, color, religious or political beliefs.

Sadly, that’s just not the case all the time. I live in the south (United States that is) and we still have issues all the time – not just about same sex but interracial too and in talking with folks from other countries etc, I realize I truly live in a backward area. Just last night in the news in the capital city of Virginia, we had an issue with a judge that needed a certain amount of votes in order to make his “seat”. Now, the truth to being a judge is that you are required to either or not vote. Certainly occasional absences are allowed given vacation or illness but… You are required to participate as much as possible.

To that end, not only did a vast majority not vote – i.e. angering certain of the members to a point they contacted the media, but when the media tried to hunt down the 36 members who did not participate in the vote, it was interesting how many of them just couldn’t be found or had no comment. Guess what, the guy is openly gay. One of the judges actually had the nerve to mention he was concerned about the guy’s moral values. WTH? When and what year are we living in?

We all have issues and beliefs as human beings. We all want nothing more than to succeed and love, have families and friends, and hopefully in our off time be able to enjoy what we believe in. I’m not Christian but those that are I am thrilled you have something you so strongly believe in. I’m not gay but I have no problems enjoying my friends, my good friends, and sharing laughter and dinner and wine and – oh my GOD – even discussions about sex.

I am a white woman (by the way did you see that white children are now the minority?) yet I have black friends and Chinese friends and… And I would and love them based on the person – not the color. I am not a Republican and have argued STRONGLY for and against my sides BUT… I do not nor will I condemn those who believe in what they believe in. Why should sexual preference be any different? Why should it matter?

At the end of the day – guess what. Love is love – no matter what color, sex or religion. Get it? Fight against the horrors and the fears. Stand up for ONCE and share your voice. Guess what, you may need that for something you believe in. Love is hard enough for most folks. Finding the right partner sometimes takes years and sometimes it never happens. I certainly know how difficult relationships can be. We all THINK we know us inside and what we want, but sometimes there is no perfect person out there.

I’m learned hard lessons over the past years and more recently weeks and nothing and no one is perfect, including me, BUT… I refuse to allow myself to feel bad about what I want or need and the fact I have to try every day – a hell of a lot of times after being thrown against a brick wall. But I’m lucky. I’m a white woman in a het relationship and that’s supposed to be easy for me. RIGHT…

Next time you even think about laughing or scoffing at a relationship you don’t know, ask yourself this question – are you any better? Do you think you know any better? Then ask…why…

Something to think about. New on the hop – came in late and hopefully I’ll have links up for tomorrow but there are a hell of a lot of other talented writers and fabulous people involved in this and I so hope you will enjoy and participate but more importantly, remember…

Kisses   xxx

Cassandre