I have a very sexy guest with me today with a taste of her upcoming hotness but be warned – a couple of very “x” rated pictures that are oh so yummy.
Casea Major
Cassadre Dayne – thank you for having me as a guest today in your lovely virtual home.
When I was growing up in the 1980’s oral sex was hush-hush never 
spoken of in polite society. Nowadays, it seems more widely accepted and in some cases even expected. Especially in erotic romance
In my reading, I’ve found an exorbitant amount of oral sex. In the m/f stories I read, more than three quarters have some depiction of oral sex and that includes the mainstream non-erotic. Generally in the stories, the male is the giver and the female the receiver. But this flies in the face of actual statistics.
According to a survey done on AskMen.com — The numbers on how many men have received oral sex from a woman and given oral sex to a woman in the past year show a perturbing discrepancy. It seems that men in nearly every age category are more likely to receive oral sex from their female partners than to give it. Only the 18- to 24-year-olds are tipping the oral scales in the other direction, offering more mouth action than their female counterparts. It goes without saying that a woman getting enough oral sex is a happier woman, and all the more willing to reciprocate. 
Read more: http://www.askmen.com/daily/sex_tips_400/418_sex-stats-you-can-use.html#ixzz1pacP9Y7n
In my new release with Decadent Publishing, Night with a Dom, my heroine strongly desires oral sex – an act her ex-boyfriend had been unwilling to give her. But on her New Year’s Eve 1Night Stand, Mel gets more than she bargains for with Dominc, her date and Dom for the evening.
So tell me, how do you feel about oral sex in life and literature? Like it? Pitching or catching? (I’m a baseball fan.)
Night with a Dom
Casea Major
Blurb:
Melody Manning’s workaholic ambition, coupled with a slave-
driving former boss, has made her the youngest market analyst in her firm. It’s also killed her personal life, including losing her fiancé. When she receives a message from him on New Year’s Eve announcing his engagement to another woman, Mel loses it. Her new, more compassionate boss has the perfect solution for her—get laid. Good and laid.
At his suggestion, she signs up with the 1Night Stand service, listing her deepest sexual desires on the application. A speedy response from Madame Eve has Melody on her way to Sonoma Valley wine country and a one-night stand with a mysterious Dom.
The sexy, masked Master promises to get to the bottom of her guilt and provide ultimate satisfaction under the safety of his stern hand. After an emotional night of submission and uninhibited passion, will her lover’s unmasking lead to the end of their encounter or give Mel another chance at love?
Major Love ~~~ Major Romance
Prior to becoming a writer of romantic fiction, Casea Major worked in the legal field for a non-profit dispute resolution company for ten years. She is now a full-time mom to three preschool children with whom she and her husband live happily…most of the time. When she isn’t chained to her laptop, she enjoys Cary Grant movies and crocheting.
Thank you for being a part of my wicked worlds!
Kisses xxx
Cassandre
Passion with a Dark and Dangerous Twist 
I see it most of the books I read and it’s true that in books the female seems to receive more than the man does. I think it’s something a lot of women like to hear, want and it just doesn’t in reality. 🙂
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Menina – I have a question. Are you really crazy? LOL You’re here so I have to assume. If so, then you are in good company. :0) I see a lot of men going down in books. In almost everyone I read, in fact. If I write oral sex into a scene I try to give the man and woman both the experience of giving and recieving. In fact, some of my most intimate sex scenes are 69 positions. I just find that engaging on emotional as well as physical levels.
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LOL Menina is actually my cat. **points at the pic** She is 16 and will be 17 soon. She’s been crazy since we got her when she was a kitten. 😉 Of course, there’s that saying human’s and their pet’s are often alike. 😉
69s are becoming more common. It used to be that I rarely saw it in erotica but, now I’m starting to see it even in my mainstream books. I think that those on the ‘fringe’s’ of book publishing seem to herald what’s coming in mainstream. Which is why I love to keep up with both. 🙂
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Oral sex has been mainstream for a couple years now. In some of the mainstream’s that I have read, some are more graphic than others. In erotic its a given that there will be oral sex on the woman. On the men, not as much. Which is sad, really.
I grew up in the 80’s too and oral sex was the one topic that was not discussed among my girlfriends and I, but it was something that we all knew everyone was getting from their boyfriends. 🙂 In the 90’s certain people didn’t believe that having oral sex was actually sex because there was no penetration; I believe that it is. Now in the 21st century, it is something that is discussed in great length, articles are written about it and Oprah talked about it.
I agree that a woman pleasured is a happy woman and most men love to have their women satisfied.
Great post Casea.
Marika
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So true, Marika. Why can’t we give the guys a little more oral love in our romances? Do you think that a lot of women are put off by the act?
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I think some women are put off by smell, taste and their own insecurities. They might think that they are not any good at it therefore, not willing to try it again. Maybe a past lover told them that, I’m not sure. I don’t know of any man that doesn’t want a woman touching him. It could be their mouth, hands, tongue or maybe even a feather. I’ve asked male friends of mine over the years and that seems to be their one compliant. Their women don’t touch them at all, regardless of where they touch them. As the hubs once said to me, I don’t care where you touch me as long as you are touching me. Sorry if TMI. But its true. Ladies, please touch your men. You might be surprised where it leads. 🙂
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Hafta say for starters that both halves of Adriana love oral sex, in real life and in books. Those statistics you reported are sad indeed! Especially so, since women can have multiple orgasms and a little (or a lot of!) oral foreplay for HER will never diminish HIS pleasure once he penetrates. So here’s to more reciprocity and great hot scenes!
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Here, here! Well said, Adriana. I am a proud enjoyer of both sides of oral sex too. I think if we put more fellatio in our stories and more cunnilingus in real life maybe we can balance the scales. LOL Thanks for commenting.
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Thanks! Actually I think Terry McMillan’s novel Waiting to Exhale in the mid nineties helped normalize it (plus I laughed my head off the whole way through the book) – one of the four heroines is describing the new guy to her friends and says he must have gone to the best p—y eating school in the world. One of my fave lines!
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I’ve noticed a lot of oral sex in the books I read–and the ones I write! I suspect that your heroine, Mel, is not the only woman who’s been denied this sort of pleasure, so women yearning for it want to experience it vicariously if not in actuality. I also suspect the increase in male-to-female oral sex in the 18 to 25 year old category stems from the fact that oral sex won’t get you pregnant and will preserve physical virginity in a female (if that really matters to them any more). Great post, Casea!
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Jenna – I had thought the same thing about the pregnancy issue in that age group. I love reading your sex scenes. They are so… stimulating. LOL
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I have a very steamy scene with it in Branded, but it’s the hero on the heroine. Never have written a book where the other way seemed to fit.
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D’Ann – I think your next heroine needs to have and oral fixation. LOL And I would LOVE the read an oral sex scene with Cord. I just got chills. 😉
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My observation is the opposite–that women are more likely to resist giving oral sex and are more self-conscious about receiving it. I know loads of women who refuse to give head to men, though I’ve never met a man who refused to go down on a man or woman. IMO it seems to come down (pun) more to who is more confident and adventurous, and that’s largely still men. \o/
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Interesting, Fierce. I think you have a good point. For as much as we women think (and I’m generalizing here) that we’ve had our sexual revoloution. Men still have less inhibitions and more sexual confidence on the whole. Great conversation.
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As an erotic romance writer – I say go for it – I written guy on girl and girl on guy. If I could figure out how to write a menage I’d write – guy on girl on guy on girl on……
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Okay Daryl – I knew I could count on you to bring it all out in the open! LOL And I love your sex scenes, BTW!
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I am all over oral sex. I think it is hot, dirty, sexy….steamy…you name it. There is so much fun two partners can have when participating in oral sex.. My thing with it is this…looking at your statistics …If a man doesn’t reciprocate there is no way in hell I would be giving him head…and nothing in return. To me that is just rude! LOL. If he expects it..so do I!
I love to read it in books. For women loads of foreplay is a must…so why not go downtown and help that along…? The man/men/woman/women will surely be rewarded for taking the time to divulge.
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Amen, Sister! I’m all about going downtown! Thanks so much for commenting.
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LOL Casea girl..you and me both. You and me both!
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Oral sex should be part of sex–for both male and female–in books and in real life.
Sex without oral sex…well it’s just doing it, not making love, lol.
In my writing, I always have the hero performing oral on the heroine, and then I will always have a sex scene where she returns the fav on the hero. But I don’t go into as much detail when she is doing the oral exam on him because I read an article that some women HATE doing the oral thing to a guy, so best to keep the details down a notch.
And hey, I don’t agree with that at ALL, but for some reason, I can’t get the advice from that asinine article out of my head.
Great post, Casea.
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Brenda – You are right. In the act of intimacy oral sex can be rewarding physically and emotionally bringing a couple into union. Yes – it can be dirty, steamy but it is also beautiful and spiritually fulfilling.
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Ok trying this again. I did post before. LOL the posting demons ate it I guess. I for one think that if a male expects oral sex he should be willing to reciprocate. I love it. I think that it is a down and dirty, sexy, hot, steamy way to get up close and personal with a partner. I expect if one partner hates it, then that would be an issue. But if a partner/s loves it, then it should be something shared.
I love it IRL and I love it in books. Keep it “coming” because it is an integral part of a mature sexual relationship. Fun and Hot…!
I feel if there was a bit more this kind of stimulation from both parties…there would be a lot less heartache! 🙂
Great post…very stimulating…and mind blowing amongst other things.
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personally, as a giver and receiver I give oral sex a thumbs up for sure.
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Yes – Two thumbs up! Liz, as a writer of same sex romances How does oral sex play a role in the sex scenes and in the development of the relationship?
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well, a man is a man. They are hard wired for contact “down there”. I don’t know of many men who would turn down a blow job, unless it’s given inexpertly (read: ouch). Therefore, in my m/m stories oral plays a huge part in the relationship. Many times it’s the foreplay for one man, or even for them both. It may seem like a “one off” or “throw away” moment for some men, but for the men I write about it’s a meaningful activity. I mean, you gotta trust a guy to let his teeth near your cock, after all, no?
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Sheri here, who’s having a blast looking at the pics and reading the comments.
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I agree with Brenda that oral sex is just a normal part of love making. I always perform it at some point during sex, the amount of pleasure it gives him spurs me on and l love the way he feels inside my mouth. I don’t understand why anyone would not want to give oral, if you love someone you love every part of their body don’t you? Intimacy involves exploring each other fully, how can you do that without oral? I also like to receive, but not at the same time as l find it hard to concentrate!
Great post!
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I disagree that a woman who receives oral is a happier woman in general. And I certainly don’t think it should be a part of every woman’s life. There are some women out there who don’t like it — I’m one of them.
Receiving oral sex is NOT necessary for intimacy, and foreplay is not a must for all women. If someone wants to think I’m not adventurous, that’s up to them. I prefer to say I’m confident for knowing what I like and what I don’t like.
Of course, that’s applying it to real life. When it comes to fiction, I don’t always have one partner going down on the other, either. I don’t hold back from writing it if necessary, but saying “Character X should always perform oral on Character Y,” leads to formulaic writing.
Characters should be as individual as real life people are — even the ones who just don’t like to receive oral.
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