That’s a question I have been posting for months and sharing a woman’s journey into entering into the lifestyle. Well, the book is FREE FREE FREE this weekend only! Take a look at the first in the trilogy and a sexy part 2 – that’s not part of the trilogy but a beautiful flash piece coming out with my co-writer, Benjamin Russell. So… here’s an excerpt for you and the download link is at the bottom along with a synopsis of Lessons Learned.
ON BECOMING HIS
He is my lover
He is my friend
He is my Sir
Jezebel Waters, Jessie to all who knew her, sat at her kitchen table aimlessly swirling her finger around the edge of her wine glass. The words a mantra, she had been saying them over and over again for weeks. This wasn’t about convincing herself of anything. The words were frankly stated and utterly the truth, and in fact had allowed her soul to be freed completely for the first time in her life. The thought, even to her, seemed odd initially, but the moment she’d not only accepted the realization but also really worked through the why’s in her mind, the day had been one of the best in her life. And very freeing. Sadly, this was also a concept and a lifestyle she had no idea how to explain to others why she wanted something so different – no had to have the blissful change in her life. How the hell could she? After all, she was a strong woman in every term of the word. Jessie had it all. That’s what everyone told her. But the truth was, she’d been unhappy the majority of her adult life. At least the partial truth was her life was full of broken dreams and she wanted more – so much more.
Sighing, Jessie tried to simply hone in on the intense rock music blasting from the CD player and groaned. What she needed was something softer, given the mood she was in. Rising to her feet, she slowly walked into the living room and flipped through her eclectic selection of music, finally selecting her favorite Spanish guitarist. The moment the sultry sounds filtered into the air, she exhaled slowly. Nodding, she folded her arms and walked back to retrieve her wine, her nerves frazzled.
Why the hell she was so antsy wasn’t really wasn’t the question. She knew why. After all, she’d fallen hard for a man who continued to take her breath away. Taking a sip of wine, she licked the rim and thought about him. Luke Brennan was everything she’d ever wanted in a lover and mate. From his rugged features and deep chocolate skin to his soulful eyes and quiet demeanor, he was without a doubt the most intriguing man she’d ever met. He was also a practiced Dom but hadn’t had a sub in many years, almost a decade. The thought giving her a shudder, she moved toward the window, staring out at the afternoon sky.
Palming the glass, she slumped against the window frame as a tremor of fear skated down her spine. This was the perfect relationship for her and one she’d only come to understand and appreciate recently. Well, that wasn’t entirely true. Hissing, she took a gulp of her wine and closed her eyes. The absolute truth was that she had thought about entering into a D/s situation on more than one occasion, even going so far as to do hours, days worth of research on the Internet and she couldn’t deny she was utterly and completely terrified. You want to submit. You crave everything about the lifestyle and the man. Granted, the words were very true and she continued to repeat them over and over to herself like a mantra – and she had several she’d practiced time and time again.
Laughing, Jessie licked her lips as her heart raced. How many nights had she lain awake doing nothing but thinking about this? How many times had she opened her mouth simply to say the words out loud and couldn’t do it? “You’re terrified. Admit it.” Yes, she was. Trust. That was part of the reason and she couldn’t deny she’d never met a man she could trust, not only with her brutal admittance but also with the concept of turning over every aspect of her normal, daily routine to. After all, her previous boyfriends and fiancés were not only fairly conservative with regard to their life both in and out of the bedroom, but they would have thought she was a complete freak if she ever told them about her desires.
Yes, I long to be your submissive and to have you own me, tell me what to do and I want to be required to follow rules. I want to be collared and disciplined as necessary. I crave being your submissive sexually and in our everyday life, allowing you anything and everything you want. Sighing, just thinking the words gave her chills. This wasn’t the kind of admission you told anyone. Period. And she hadn’t, realizing her friends and family would think she was out of her mind. Then she met Luke and suddenly everything seemed possible.
Nibbling her bottom lip, Jessie had finally figured out her longing began in her early twenties, but back then she had no idea what she thought she wanted nor was the concept of entering into a D/s relationship even talked about in society very much. It was an ugly, dark and very secretive desire – if people really had them. Jesus Christ, the thought of a man taking control of her life would have been scandalous fader to the point her girlfriends at the time would have had her committed. And so Jessie followed the path of least resistance, entering into very vanilla relationships time and time again. That is after a bad girl period in which one too many dangerous men had taken her on a path of near destruction. Shuddering, she could see how ridiculous her risky behavior had been but at the time she thought she was having fun, not soul searching for some perfect mate.
Jezebel Waters, Jessie to her friends, had everything in her life that she could ever want. From a successful career as a top-level executive, a hefty salary and fabulous friends, she had the world in the palm of her hand – except for the right man in her life. In the back of her mind she knew she was missing something and the realization was almost terrifying. She craved being under the command of a powerful Dom, but how the hell could she admit to anyone what she considered her kinky needs?
Resigned to living a very vanilla life, she entered into several relationships and every one of them failed miserably. Jessie gave up on love – until she met Luke Brennan. From his gorgeous chocolate-laced skin to his quiet yet powerful demeanor, Jessie was hooked on learning more. Growing close, when he admitted his own needs, she knew she’d found everything she’d been searching for her entire life. While Luke wanted nothing more than to own her, he was hesitant to enter into the agreement until she completely understood the life she would lead as a collared woman.
While she was more than eager to learn, she remained terrified of the girl inside and of her dark hungers. Join Jessie on an emotional journey as she delves deep into her psyche, not only beginning to understand her willingness to become Luke’s in every way, but also to comprehend exactly what the new beginning would entail — trust and control. Through poems and prose, this story is just the beginning for both…
ON BECOMING HIS – LESSONS LEARNED
Jezebel Waters and Luke Brennan entered into a D/s life together, exploring and learning the sacred concepts of trust, love, understanding, willingness to please, submission and utter devotion. Their journey was ongoing and in her mind, she’d truly embraced every aspect, including control — his control. Luke was a strict disciplinarian but also a passionate mate, who gave her his entire heart, soul and most importantly –his total acceptance of all of her. In turn, she was required to give him every aspect of herself, no matter what he asked. There were challenges along the way and while Jessie was committed to obeying, she was after all, willful.
Share the story of Jessie and Luke as they continue on an emotional journey together. For Jessie she must delve deep into her psyche, not only beginning to understand her willingness to become Luke’s submissive in every way. She also must comprehend exactly what the new beginning would entail — trust and control. For Luke, he must learn to balance his need to have devotion and obedience with patience. Jessie’s struggles to embrace every aspect of the lifestyle, challenges him to understand and accept there will be rough patches along the way.
During one moment of weakness, her devotion to him is brought into question and in turn, Luke is forced to issue the ultimate in punishments. Join a flash fiction read telling the tears and frustrations both Luke and Jessie share as she begins to regain his trust and his confidence in her understanding of his needs.
On Becoming His, the first in the trilogy series, introduces you to Jessie and Luke. On Becoming Her Sir, will further delve into their exploration of the lifestyle and the challenges they both must face, both personally and together as a couple. Can they survive the pitfalls to obtain what few ever achieve, the most committed and very powerful of relationships? Only their continued journey will tell…
The journey will never end. It is only the beginning…
I so hope you enjoyed and PLEASE if you do download, send me an email and let me know what you think…