Do I Love All Things Kink?

I know — that’s the kind of question that gets you all hot and bothered in the morning, isn’t it? Well the sexy answer is – yes, Yes, YES! But… Do I do everything I write about? Since there is nothing I generally don’t write about in erotic, if I did then I’d have no time to write. A girl can dream however. I had the joy of being on a radio show as a guest last night – The Naughty Slot hosted by the oh-so-sexy Amber Grayson Vayle on the Shark Radio Network and not only wanted to give an awesome THANK YOU to the sexy lady and the show but give you a link later in case you missed it. I love doing radio shows. Many of you know that I’ve hosted my own on Blog Talk Radio for the last couple of years interviewing writers myself and we always get into very interesting topics. Writing erotic romance isn’t unlike writing anything else from science fiction to horror. There are simply additional aspects involved.

In writing the sexy genre, is this just about the imagination? Hmm… Well, I do have a very vivid one and I dream in color, but the truth is you have to do a hell of a lot of reading, research, writing and re-writing and thinking in order to be able to pull of many aspects of what you’re putting down on paper. Sometimes this includes trying some sexy things out. Think a collection of toys in one oversized drawer and lots of batteries for on. Okay before you go pulling out a chair and take down notes to remind me of just how wicked I am later, let me tell you what I mean. First of all do I love passion and sex? If I have to really give you that answer then I’m terrified for you. Of course I do. I honestly think a hell of a lot of women get a damn bad name for not enjoying or craving sex. The truth is I do every day. I need a man with a huge appetite for all things passionate. But there is a lot more that goes into writing sexy stories.

Research is a wonderful tool and of course you can do so much simply by staying behind your computer and searching the Internet but honestly? You only get a very jaded view of what you’re looking at, no matter how informative you think the articles are. For example, last night there was a listener who obviously is a regular and she has a location in Las Vegas specializing in providing electrical stimulation play. From what Amber said she has a huge following and is highly respected. Oh trust me I’ll at least be visiting the location the next time I’m in Vegas – for research purposes only. LOL I’ve inserted a little of this in my stories but having never actually felt or seen the play, I’m not expert. For those of who don’t know what I’m talking about – Google the Violent Wand as a method and you’ll see what I’m talking about.

I think the best method of learning is by talking to people in the lifestyle. Not meaning to criticize other writers because we’re all simply trying to learn our craft and hopefully have readers enjoy and BUY our books, BUT… The craze with BDSM is showing a springboard effect of writers jumping on the bandwagon genre. Hell, you guys know I love to write about a D/s relationship including aspects of BDSM, but I’ve talked many a time about how I have spent hours, day, months talking with those in the lifestyle as well as reading. When I see some of the books come out on how to be a good Dom etc. and the writer has never spoken with one I do cringe. That being said I am NO expert and try and learn more every day.

I was laughing as the show ended last night because I realized I have a few kinky new twitter followers including many in the BDSM/Domestic Discipline worlds. But that’s honestly an honor for those who follow you. I write and tag my articles as appropriate and generally that’s one way folks find you in order to follow you. One would hope they actually look at what the person is doing before they follow so I think that’s a lovely gesture. Maybe, just maybe I’m getting it right.

Amber teased me saying there’s nothing I don’t write about from aliens to vampires, ménage to BDSM and she’s right. I love mixing it up with my writing. There’s nothing I won’t talk to you about or add to my books and why? Because no matter what you think, we’re all craving a little kink buried deep inside our souls. From the longing to be tied up to a powerful Dom wielding a flogger, or a pair of handcuffs slipped inside our Christmas stockings to a taste of voyeurism and public display – there’s something we long for. Me? Well, if I told you I’d have to tie you up… But you can imagine. In my stories I try and add reality with my fantasy and hopefully as a single person, couple or perhaps one involved in a polyamory or D/s relationship you’re going to get a little something new to spark your “tastes”. Just a few thoughts for this Friday and hopefully you’ll grab your partner later and do something very kinky indeed.

Kisses   xxx


Pppsssttt – in case you’d like to see what The Naughty Slot is all about, here’s the sexy facebook page.

And Benjamin Russell and I created a facebook page just for our continuing D/s collection – The One Becoming His Series, which talks about D/s – and here’s our link.

Here’s the link to the radio show last night…

About Cassandre Dayne

Cassandre Dayne is the pseudo for the best selling author of romantic suspense and thrillers
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6 Responses to Do I Love All Things Kink?

  1. Love it Cass. That’s why I read and DON’T write the genre. I hate when people get a sports call wrong in a book I can only imagine how I’d mess up any sex scene let alone a dinner conversation from a practicing couple. Thank you for being the ‘martyr’ and being tied to a cross ***tee hee*** so I can peek into the lifestyle and see how it really is and can find when people are twisting it for a cheap read…something I know I’ll never get with a Cassandre Dayne book.


  2. Nikki Prince says:

    This was great Cass. I believe as you say that research is important. I plan to delve into the genre at some point having had some real life experiences in the lifestyle. But still find it important. Thanks again.



  3. Mmmm…I believe a little (or a lot of) kink can go along way in spicing things up! The erotic possibilities really are endless when both are on board to let passion be the guide. 😉


  4. First off huge congrats on the fantastic show. Been watching it and it was hot. Cassandre you know you bring the kink. Kiink is a huge world. I think the people doing it, as long as they are up for exploring and trying new things that is the best part.


  5. First off huge congrats on the fantastic show. Been watching it and it was hot. Cassandre you know you bring the kink. Kink is a huge world. I think the people doing it, as long as they are up for exploring and trying new things that is the best part.


  6. Susan Ryan says:

    Now…reading this makes a woman who is sick..bad cold feel better…yep some erotic nver hurt any woman…and ti find a man who shares your crazy looney sexcapes….money in the bank…LOL..
    great blog and radio show


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