Sharing…Sexual Sin IV

I’m so pleased when readers can tell that I place a lot of the woman I am inside both the blogs as well as the female characters in my stories. The emotions are indeed very raw, very personal and I love being able to explore various sides of not only the lifestyle but my needs as they evolve. Adding John Patrick’s thoughts initially was merely about the communication we had, conversations regarding the lifestyle in general – likes and dislikes, worries and fears, hungers and limits. Just as with every relationship, whether vanilla, D/s, DD Absolute Poweror the various forms, you go through several evolutions.

I throw a lot of questions at John Patrick throughout the day. There is nothing off limits for us to discuss and we realized early on that we had something very special in our ability to talk about anything and everything without holding back. He asked me recently (after having been sent another barrage of thought provoking questions) whether I realized I was getting an extremely deep level of knowledge about him. Of course what he meant was that I force him to look to the very core of his being, ripping off his private mask, one that we all wear – and we do. We hide behind the persona we think we are or should be or one that’s been programmed simply because of jobs, families, difficult times and joy.

Ask yourself this – are you really the person you were when you were twenty? Thirty? My guess is you’ve changed a hell of a lot. Granted, we all do to a certain extent, but are you the person you thought you were going to be, living the life you dreamed about all those years ago? Some of us can say yes. What about those who take a job or marry someone because they thought they needed to change as a person. Then you find out you were fooling yourself. Hmmm… What I’ve unlocked within John Patrick is his ability to allow the freedom to truly be himself. It’s a gift to me, one I don’t take lightly either. When he shares aspects of his desires and I share them with my readers, I think you see a much more well rounded concept about D/s.

Initially John Patrick was concerned about showing either our combined or individual fears and reservations, issues we’ve had such as disobedience. I reminded him that there is no relationship without issues. None. Now, working through the various concerns as well as writing about and sharing them, is cathartic and healing. The very concept of sharing intimacy with a third person is something I have very real angst about. If you’ve read any of the previous blogs you know my feelings and why I’m worried. So does John Patrick. We have other worries and through our intense talks we’ve really learned a lot about each other – I dare say more than a traditional couple probably does.

When we were talking about how much closer we’ve become, I made a comment that as couples get together they talk about favorite movies, food, restaurants, vacations, family life, religion – just to determine if there’s a connection. After a few dates you fall into knowing he or she will like your choice of movie and date night. You might have in depth conversations about what you see in a marriage, kids, careers etc. You have to know if he or she is the right one for you. When you settle into a lovely routine, perhaps falling into love – do you continue to pepper your mate with questions, delving into their dark fears, deep sexual needs? Hmmm… Again, for John Patrick and I, there is no subject off limits so we literally talk about items that probably few of your friends and family members do. There is little in the way of my dark needs he hasn’t heard about – the kind a huge portion of friends and acquaintances would run screaming from – trust me. That’s an incredible aspect about what we share together. I’ve given this advice before and I will again, keep talking as you move into this relationship. Never allow your fears to stand in the way. For me, talking about and writing about sharing has abated many of my worries. Now back to the last installment of the story – that is until I create the little book. Oh and more questions and answers coming from John Patrick in the next few days.

Dyson heard Daphne crying and his heart was aching, his own tears difficult to push mine darlingaway. She’d held back her raw emotions the entire night, keeping the mask firmly placed on her beautiful face. The moment Nicky had left she’d fled into the bathroom, feigning a headache from too much wine, but he knew better. The envelope had been pushed too far too quickly. Sagging against the counter he scanned the kitchen. His lovely wife had scoured every surface, shining the stainless steel appliances until they were gleaming. Yeah, she was nervous as hell and no doubt hurting inside.

Anger boiled through him, ripping at his heart. He was furious with himself. He’d seen all the signs she wasn’t ready, wasn’t certain sharing was right for their relationship. He pressed his hand over his mouth, sucking in his breath as he tried to figure out what to do. Nicky was exactly as Daphne had described and would certainly understand if he called off their next meeting, which of course was planned for the weekend. Granted, he was the Dom and Daphne knew he would make the final decision, but right now, he didn’t feel much like a Dom. In fact, he felt more like a cad – an uncaring asshole. Spanking Daphne had been one thing. Spanking Nicky was something else entirely.

Groaning, he debated whether he should leave Daphne alone, give her time to regroup and think. She normally peppered him with questions after any new step in their journey. Her silence was deafening. He turned off the kitchen light and slowly moved toward the bedroom, anticipating hearing her sobs. When he heard no sounds he became concerned. The door was pushed closed but not latched and the moment he pressed his fingers against the cool wood, easing open the door, he allowed a single tear to fall. Dyson had never seen her seem so fragile, so out of her element. Sitting on the side of the bed, her head lowered, she looked more like a lost child than his beguiling and very willful wife. For a few seconds he admired her strong shoulders and the nape of her neck, the way her blond hair curled around her upper arms. She was wearing the fuchsia teddy, his favorite and one the very color he adored her in. Everything about her was sensual, her mannerisms seductive. And he loved her with all his heart.

The moment he took a step toward her she shifted, darting a single glance. She was nibbling on her bottom lip, a nervous tick appearing only when she was frightened.

“Do you love me?” The question seemed to slip past her lips.

Dyson was taken aback. “More than anything. Are you doubting my love?” He could tell she was struggling with the answer. Now his heart was racing.

“I… No, I know you love me.”

“Good.” He moved around the bed and she shot him another look, pushing back the only way she knew how given her submissiveness. The realization struck him hard.

“Am I good enough?”

“What?” Was she really asking this question?

“Am I good enough for you, enough for you?” Lifting her head she locked eyes with him, no longer biting down on her lip.

Stunned, he was at a complete loss for words, realizing instantly his hesitation seemed to confirm her greatest fear – he was replacing her. “Oh baby.” Gathering her into his arms he pulled her to her tiptoes as he held her tightly against him, mortified her entire body was trembling. He held the back of her head as she clung to him. This was a defining moment, one in which he needed to make certain she understood exactly his thoughts, without holding anything back.

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be upset,” she whispered, the sound strangled.

“Baby, you can be upset. My God, do I ever give you the impression you can’t express your thoughts, your worries or fears? Do I?”

“No. It’s just…” Daphne wiggled out of his hold, swallowing hard as she closed her eyes.

The way tears slipped from her lashes, trickling down her cheeks nearly destroyed him. Taking both of her hands into his he rubbed his thumbs across her porcelain skin. “Sharing isn’t something I’m taking lightly. I hope you know that.”

“I do. I’m not questioning…”

“Ssshhh… Let me talk, dearest.” He kept the lilt in his voice, hoping she would smile. When she didn’t his nerves kicked in. “I’m not. This is very important and THe gripI’m in no means trying to replace you. This isn’t about spending time with you then with Nicky. This is only about you and I sharing with each other. Do you understand the difference?”

Nodding, Daphne finally gave him a slight smile.

“Do you really understand? You’re my love, my lover, my wife and my submissive. If, and I do say if, we decide to have Nicky become a part of our lives it’s all about you and me first. I see her as pleasing you first. Do you understand?”

“Yes sir.” Her voice was filled with more confidence, yet her tears continued to fall.

“You are my life, the woman I can’t live without. I’m not trying to replace you.”

“I’m also your submissive. You have the last word.”

“Yes, that’s true, and I’m very proud of what we have, but sharing will only be if this is right for both of us. Period.” He lifted her chin. “Never forget how much I love you.” He remained quiet, allowing her time to process.

Rising onto her toes she gave him a seductive look as she inched forward. “My Sir. I love you.”

The kiss was passionate, full of a love that had deepened so much since entering into a D/s lifestyle. Dyson continued to be surprised how much they’d grown, sharing everything as a couple. Sharing. God, was he doing the right thing? The journey was interesting. He slipped his tongue into the dark recesses of her mouth, tasting the woman who gave him every aspect of her body and soul. Tonight the passion was more intense, his needs racing off the charts. Tonight he had to have all of her, take her in every hole, make certain she knew he would never forsake her. When he broke the kiss he cupped her face. “You are mine. I own you, possess you.”

“And I’ll give you everything, serve you.” Gripping his wrists her eyes darted back and forth. “May I serve you tonight?”

“I would be honored.” God he loved her. “You’re amazing.

“I’m just me.” Her eyes never leaving his, she slipped out of the vibrant silk, allowing gravity to take the soft material to the floor.

He was hungry, breathless with need and seeing her curves, her hard nipples made his cock throb.

Daphne dropped to her knees, placing her hands on his thighs and opening her mouth. She looked up at him, her eyes twinkling.

“God, you look hot.” He thrust his dick into her mouth, fucking her in hard, even strokes. He loved the way she relaxed her throat, taking almost every inch. Gripping both sides of her head he picked up his pace, savoring the wet heat of her mouth. His actions becoming more forceful he heard her gag. “Take it, baby. Take all of me.” Dyson gazed down at her, lust bridging the surface. He wanted nothing more than to fuck her until exhaustion settled in. Harder and faster he thrust into her mouth until beads of sweat trickled down his face and off his chin, landing on her nose and mouth.

Blinking, she dug her nails into his skin, her eyes watering.

“Suck my balls, baby. Suck them.”

Immediately obeying she lifted and stroked his shaft while she licked around one testicle then the other.

“Oh yeah.”
She dragged her tongue back and forth across his swollen sac several times before taking one ball into her mouth.

He shivered as she sucked one then the other, going back and forth. “Stick your finger up my ass, baby.”

Daphne slathered her tongue around his testicles before easing back. “Of course, my sir.” Inserting two fingers into her mouth she suckled them for a full minute before easing her hand around his leg, dragging the tips up the crack of his ass.

Dyson exhaled as she slipped her long fingers between his ass cheeks, finding his dark hole. As she pushed her fingers inside and continued sucking, he let out a strangled growl. Sweat continued to roll down the back of his neck and he allowed her to play, her fingers pushing past the tight ring of muscle. There was nothing like the sensations of her sucking his balls, finger fucking his asshole. But he wanted more, had to own every hole. Seconds later he could take the wait no longer.

Jerking her to her feet he turned her around to face the bed and wrapped one hand around her neck. When she was bent over, her face pressed against the bedding, he smacked her ass several times. The action was nothing more than a subtle reminder she did indeed belong to him.

Needing Your TouchWhimpering, Daphne jumped with every hard slap, her breath sounds floating into the room.

He gripped her hips and kicked her feet wide apart, righting the urge to take her savagely. Placing the tip of his dick to her sweet pussy lips he impaled her in one hard drive, the force shoving her hard against the bed. “Wet. Tight.”

She held her arms over her head, her fingers gripping the bedding. With every brutal plunge she moaned, her entire body shaking.

Dyson wanted nothing more than to ravage her, fill her with him cum. The sound of his balls slapping against her bruised ass was a powerful aphrodisiac and he was insatiable, every plunge becoming harder and faster. He slapped her ass several more times then pulled completely out, brushing the tip of his leaking cockhead up the right side of her ass cheek and down the left. “I’m going to fuck your pretty ass now.”

“God, yes sir. Please.”

Opening her cheeks wide he eased his cock into her tight hole, giving her every inch. When his balls rested against her ass he tossed his head back and moaned, amazed how her muscles constricted around the thick invasion.

She undulated back, meeting every hard thrust with one of her own.

Within seconds he was having difficulty holding back, his balls swelling with cum. He wanted to continue fucking her, filling her for hours. Unable to stop the climax he erupted into her ass. “Fuck!” Minutes later he cradled her body against his and realized she’d fallen asleep. For some reason he was filled with sadness.

Ah – very deep emotions. Both the submissive and the Dom can have very strong emotions as well as fears. That’s why total honestly, trust and communication is so vital. I hope you’ve enjoyed and will come back once I finish the story.

Kisses and spanks…


About Cassandre Dayne

Cassandre Dayne is the pseudo for the best selling author of romantic suspense and thrillers
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