Itching for a Spanking…

Let me ask you a question, ladies. Who creates more drama, you or the male you know or live with? I have my opinion. MEN. Oh you bet. Life for many males at times is tough to grasp and when a cog gets thrown in the wheel, they often shut down. Then they moan, whine about the why’s and can’t seem to talk about what either needs to happen or their feelings. In talking with John Patrick, he reminded me women are very much drama queens and I had to laugh. Really? Let me think here. There are times I think he’s all about the drama. Oh, he’d swat my ass for Undoing his beltsaying this. However, his comment did get me to thinking.

This is notoriously a stressful time of year for practically everyone. We, as women work ourselves to death shopping, trying to find the perfect gift, while we continue to go to our job, pay bills, clean, do laundry etc. We think about in-laws or other family members crowding our space and we go into super hero overdrive. We can do it all. Can’t we, ladies? I’m not saying men do nothing of course, but they tend to shirk off shopping, either waiting to the last minute or simply allowing the women to do the dirty deed. Yes, I loathe shopping. I mentioned to John Patrick I had gone out actually Christmas shopping and he laughed, saying the world was turned upside down.

Funny guy, isn’t he? Yeah, he knows me though. I race through a mall in just about ten minutes, having purchased five or six things. Yes, I’m that good. LOL. I don’t like crowds, have claustrophobia and prefer to live my life without screaming children. However, the shopping must be done – especially this time of year. The crowds and the noise, the ugly people and the ridiculous need to buy, buy, buy, are overwhelming. That leads to being in a nasty mood, biting the heads off of innocent or not so innocent people. What can you do to relieve your stress? For many of us we drink (glass of wine in hand as I’m penning this) or sleep more, overeat or continue our nasty behavior. Isn’t this supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year?

When behavior gets out of control, what’s a guy to do? Well issue a hard spanking of course. I’ve explored many a reason why a spanking is not only good for the soul, but a necessity at times. I think the holiday might just be the best reason of all. Taking down her pantiesThere is NO way either you or your dear partner hasn’t bickered about something. You know you have. Did you stand in line today, cringing as you were pushed from right to left? By the time you got to the car were you spatting about whatever – dinner preparations, the mother in law coming, who was cleaning the bathrooms? You know you did. You either continued the words, moving into a full-fledged argument where one of you said, ‘fine, don’t get me anything for Christmas’ or you sat in silence until you arrived back at home.

What now? Are you going to continue the silent treatment, hoping he’ll come up and say ‘I’m sorry’? Pigs will fly first, ladies. You know that. So you, being the willful girl that you are, egg on the entire situation. You snip and drop hints about what he hasn’t done around the house. You find something rather nasty to say about one of his family members or you remind him ten plus times about his list of chores. What does your dear husband or boy toy do at this point? Gives you the deer in the headlights look and grabs a beer, moving into the living room to find any sports game on the television. If you’re lucky, he might come out of hibernation on Christmas Eve. Does this sound like fun?

What’s a girl to do? You’ll continue to egg him on as you drink another glass of wine. Finally you’re both so pissed off you go to bed angry, wake up in a rage and the entire situation moves to a boiling point. Does this sound like fun in any way, shape or form? Now that I’ve caught your attention, imagine if the tension and stress could be eased, bringing the two of you closer together, even to the point some tasty romance occurs? What if you walked into the living room and simply stated, ‘I need a hard spanking’? What do you think his reaction would be? If you’re already practicing a form of domestic discipline or are in a D/s relationship, my guess is he’d agree with you immediately. Perhaps he’d turn off the television and pat his lap, giving you ‘that’ look.

John Patrick and I often talk about my stress levels. I get off kilter like any female, needing to center myself, and boy oh boy, this can be a tough thing to do. I’ve written several times how receiving a spanking can totally re-center a woman, allowing her to focus again. Whether the simple act gives her a reason to cry or the intimacy of sharing the very experience becomes nothing more than beautiful comfort. The fact is a spanking helps. And get this? The stress is relieved for both of you.

I think men have no idea how to react when we’re off balance, worrying about the smallest details of a holiday dinner or party, finding the perfect dress or present. They turn into themselves, finding any and every way to run to a place of peace. For them, solace can mean a football game with a beer or six. Women hate this. We need attention, affirmation that the menu is perfect or we look fabulous in the dress we purchased. We want him to say something, anything to let us know he hasn’t checked out completely.

When you allow him to take control, you’re giving him the opportunity to re-engage his way, helping you understand certain behaviors won’t be tolerated. And in truth, if you’re smart, the spanking will result in the argument ending. There’s no need to rehash the ugly words and my bet is you’ll wonder what in the hell seemed so important in the first place. Now that you’ve asked for a much-needed spanking, hopefully he’ll pull you over his lap, lift your skirt and take down your panties.


Doesn’t the sound evoke so many emotions? Whether he uses his hand, a hairbrush or his belt, the very intimate moment isn’t easy to describe unless you’ve been the bearer of a hard whipping. For me, the pain symbolizes how much he cares and every hard slap gives me tingles everywhere – yes ladies, everywhere. I’m allowed to
simply succumb, letting go of my anger and fear, worry and trepidation about whatever might be coming down the pike. Once the spanking is finished, mmm… John Patrick always curled me to his chest, whispering I’d been very good and thatGirl being spanked with a wooden hairbrush the incident was gone, done with. He kept his word, never bringing the subject up again.

Use your imagination to think about what usually happened afterwards. The kissing was so much more passionate, his touch incredible. Just to feel his warmth around me, enveloping every aspect of my body and soul was priceless. Mmm… Are you getting tingles just thinking about the possibilities?

So I issue you a challenge. If you see yourself in the woman depicted above, shore up your nerves and ask your man for a hard spanking. Trust me, you won’t regret any moment of what occurs.

Kisses and spanks and Merry Christmas…


About Cassandre Dayne

Cassandre Dayne is the pseudo for the best selling author of romantic suspense and thrillers
This entry was posted in Spanking and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Itching for a Spanking…

  1. laurellasky says:

    What do you do now when you need a spanking? You keep referring to John Patrick as if he is still with you. I know from experience that letting go of something that has had a strong meaning is very difficult. I hope you get through this difficult time in your life. I hope this observation is not taken in the wrong way because I’ve become very fond of you and only want the best for you.
    Love and hugs


    • Let’s just say the ties aren’t cut and yes, we talk. No, its not the same but we are still involved in a way. I refer to him in the present because of this. I’m not a fool and know that IF we ever manage to be together it will take perhaps a miracle but we’re not abandoning each other. He shares his thoughts with me and right now – makes me happy. The future will tell the tale. Thank you for caring. Don’t worry. I am ok


  2. laurellasky says:

    Thank you for letting me know. I’m happy that the lines of communication are still open.


  3. Kim says:

    I should have read this a week ago when you posted it. Sir informed me that we are no longer partners since his “play drive” is diminished. He wants me to find someone else to play with (and that just isn’t going to happen). I’ve cried. I’ve bitched. I’ve begged (it wasn’t pretty). All is has done is make Him feel reaffirmed that I need this life more than He does. Being as He is the one who has brought me into this life, I’m not seeing how this is possible. but I’m learning to deal. A spanking would go far to improve things, but He’s just not in the proper mindset. We are still roommates which only makes things worse, but we cannot do this without each other (financially). I’m glad you and John Patrick still talk. I’m hoping you have a brighter 2015!


    • My oh my girl – I hate hearing this. What I can tell you is that sometimes miracles can happen. I said the same thing when JP first ended what she shared – never, ever again. I honestly meant it and as I’ve explained to people, it’s not about the lifestyle as much as it is finding the one person you can share it with. Having said this, JP is finding his way back to me slowly. Even when a break happens for whatever reason, true love/desire etc somehow finds its way. I’m taking steps very cautiously because my heart so so tender but I am going to try. Take time for you and reflect. Find out again about the woman inside, let time go by then talk together. You might be surprised what happens.


      • Kim says:

        I’m holding out hope because I love and adore this man more than I ever thought possible. I know he has a lot to come to terms with. Dealing with his inner conflicts vs. society standards are just the tip of the iceberg. He promised me last night that he would come back and this man has never broken a promise to me in two years! I’m being very cautious with my heart (and body), but I do believe miracles can happen and my Sir will return. I’m discovering more about myself and, while I may not kneel for anyone else, I can still play and enjoy the lifestyle. We talk everyday and he knows that I’m simply waiting for him. He knows that I will always be here which may sound awful to most, but for him, it is the one constant he knows he can rely on. Thank you for your kind words! I needed them more than I ever thought.


      • Kim – you are welcome and please know there is hope. I can see John Patrick opening up more every day. He had to get to a place within himself of comfort and that’s still going to take time, but we are talking again and sharing the joy and the need so it can happen. Give him your greatest gift second to your submission. Give him your patience. He needs time – all men do – their way. That’s my greatest advice.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s