In case you haven’t seen or heard ALL OVER THE INTERNET (said with tongue in cheek) Christian Jensen and I are writing together and the books we are penning truly take stories to the edge. Not only are we going to challenge the reader with regard to sex, we’re moving into thrillers that are going to challenge your very belief about humanity in general. Edge Play is something I’ve not experienced personally but he and I use quite a bit of that in our stories. Toxic Leash, the first of what is already three books written together in a month, takes the concept of BDSM out for a spin. Edge Play is going to an extreme level of pain and danger. He and I were talking this week about two upcoming books we are going to write and I wanted to pull in more edge play in our writing. That’s going to take out the folks who love nothing but romance, but honestly? We’re not writing fluffy pieces. We want to drag you into Hell. Literally. Whether its sexually or based in how we bring the concept of a madman to you. We will stretch the boundaries of basic humanity.
Chris and I have a slogan we’re using – Passion, Pain & Perversion – Escape to the Extreme. And we’re so doing that. What you’re going to read you will need a stiff drink during. So, Edge Play – I was thinking about the topic and remembered a pretty graphic conversation I had with the Dom I’ve spent quite a bit of time with. I thought I’d share a few concepts about going to the extreme. The first topic in truth I could never do. I just could never go to this level and honestly the trust factor – off the charts.
I’ve written many things about BDSM and the acts and playtime and the discipline occurring within the lifestyle. But in truth what you’ve heard about are much more of a vanilla laced – if you will – events. Everything from being flogged on the “X” cross to nipple clamps, these are very traditional methods used. Then there’s what’s called Edge Play or the extreme in BDSM. What is edge play? Going far enough out on a limb that actual physical damage could occur. This could involve nipple torture, cutting, burning and breath play. In giving you a taste of something else I first caution you to read this with an open mind and listen to all the red flags going off in your brain.
Erotic asphyxiation is the term used for purposely cutting off oxygen to the brain in order to achieve sexual arousal. Chemically, when oxygen is deprived from the brain carbon dioxide is produced causing giddiness and in many people an instant arousal. It often produces a lucid, semi hallucinogenic state called hypoxia that when combined with an orgasm, the rush can be as powerful as a hit of cocaine and just as addictive. You might ask yourself, what the hell is the thrill?
You don’t have to know consciously that what you’re doing is dangerous, because all your body’s reflexes are screaming it at you. Put the back of a crooked forefinger over your windpipe, in the middle of the angle where your neck joins your chin, and push up and back very gently. It takes hardly any pressure to feel very uncomfortable indeed. Do it to someone else and they will certainly try to move your hand away without even thinking about it.
There are all kinds of things people might get out of breath control. You may find there is a sensual pleasure in just the fact of having their breathing restricted, or enjoy the way it underlines the sense of enclosure when using a mask or hood. And it is the ultimate trust game, with the bottom literally putting their life in their top’s hands.
Breath control may be used in moderation to introduce an element of vulnerability or danger into the scene. However some people pursue it to the point of near or actual unconsciousness, and enjoy the resulting psychological ‘altered state’.
There are many methods of achieving this including some things you’ve probably seen in moves such as a plastic bag being placed over the heads of the sub. Kids have been known to practice this themselves and often times with disastrous results. Within the BDSM community there are several methods including airtight masks and hoods with some form of air inlet that can be controlled can be a thrill just to wear. Using hands over the inlet will allow subtle gradations of restriction and also give easy and safe release. Gas masks are ideal since they are usually reliably made with a large, easy-to-locate inlet; anesthetists’ masks can also be employed. Leather/fetish suppliers make a wide range of purpose-built hoods, usually from rubber, but be very careful to check their integrity before playing, especially ones with a very restrictive inlet, and think carefully about how easy they are to get off. Keep a pair of big blunt-ended scissors handy as an emergency measure.
There are also other extreme methods including hanging and carotid pressure – which is literally having a force of pressure placed on your windpipe to stop the breathing for some time. I personally am not into this type of edge play and have heard too many terrible stories of people – including children who hang themselves for this reason – to even EVER consider it.
In talking with the Dom many you have heard me mention, he told me flat out there are many types of edge play he won’t consider including knife and gun play and breath control. He told me a story that haunts him to this day about a good friend of his that had a long time slave and they engaged in the practice and had for years. Unfortunately during one session of play time things got out of hand and she died. He was in jail for a few months as the police investigated him and the claims it was a consensual event and an accident. You can imagine trying to explain to a cop what you and your partner were doing and how he or she died.
It’s horrible what happened to her and while she kept records of their relationship enabling a solid background of their BDSM activities enabling him to be exonerated, he was crushed at the loss. My Dom had engaged until that time and swears never again.
There are ways you can watch carefully your partner and minimize the risks but in truth, I’m not going to go over those because I fear people who have no business in edge play will try something like this with horrendous results. I strongly encourage anyone even curious about this to spend LOTS of time talking to people and learning and reconsidering before you attempt anything of this nature. You don’t want to have something that you thought would be kinky end in death.